Monthly Archives: April 2020

I don’t know where they come from.

I hate that it’s been so many days since I’ve written. Ya know, last week it didn’t even occur to me to write. The whole week just blinked by. I don’t even know where it went. So much time was … Continue reading

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Somewhere in between the beginning and the end.

I was kind of fooling myself with the optimism when it came to my knees injury. I knew it the other day when I typed that I was just as committed to my dream. Because I knew that I wasn’t. … Continue reading

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Keep my composure when it’s time.

I jacked up my knee(s) a bit. I’m thinking it’s patellar tendinitis. Seems the most likely culprit. The universe was like “hold up, li’l girl” and then instead of stomping about it–because that would have really hurt–I said “okay” and … Continue reading

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Hold on to the thread.

I realized last night I take my recent decrease in anxiety entirely for granted. I read a post about a girl who is filled with anxiety and dread when she has to go to the store. As an anxiety survivor … Continue reading

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The voice that’s been calling me back home.

I had a panic attack this afternoon. I feel compelled to write about it because I learned a lot of things. First, a panic attack is not failure. It is a lesson learned. Second, it’s not weakness. It is an … Continue reading

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The ground beneath your feet.

Ohmygosh, guys, my legs! I have never run that hard before. I’ve never pushed myself like that before. My thighs burn!! I ran so hard, I thought I might puke! It’s fucking amazing! Today was 25 minutes of 30/30 with … Continue reading

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I know what I know if you know what I mean.

Future me shared in confidence today. This eating disorder can appear at any time–nature of the disease. When things are really blah or really awesome. Any time it wants. Future me stays proactive. So I stay proactive. Today the boys … Continue reading

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Fault lines that cannot sit still.

The Lightbulb I’ve heard a lot of great quotes in my lifetime that provide these life changing lightbulb moments for me. I “AHA!” and then…nada. Lightbulb doesn’t stick. Such is life sometimes. I’m only human. I’ve heard quotes before about … Continue reading

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Who I’m meant to be.

New goals met!! 30 second run/30 second walk. 20 minutes!! (5 min warm up/cool down) Running for that long was so challenging! There were so many thoughts bouncing around in my head. My left ankle tendon throbs! Slow breathe in; … Continue reading

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I’m so much more.

Training day #….something. #5. Back to running today. 15 on. 45 off. 30 minutes. 30 FREAKING MINUTES!!! The weather was fair. No rain today! Dry ground. And my first ever 30 minutes!! The universe challenged me again today. My neighbors … Continue reading

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