Tag Archives: mental health

Faster than I can.

I’m so count-y this morning. I just want it to be time to eat. I’m certain it has nothing to do with food and everything to do with my head. But I don’t want to put in the work. This … Continue reading

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Running around in your head.

I feel like I should recap my day. Touch base with the multitudes of people who come across my words. (This is where you laugh. I know no one reads.) I survived this day. Better yet, I was thriving by … Continue reading

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Running around in your head.

I feel like I should recap my day. Touch base with the multitudes of people who come across my words. (This is where you laugh. I know no one reads.) I survived this day. Better yet, I was thriving by … Continue reading

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Shaking seems to hinder every grasp.

I’m counting down the minutes today. At 9:40 I decided that since I don’t feel good, eating toast is perfectly acceptable. I didn’t. At 10, I decided I’d for sure eat something early and it was okay. I didn’t. At … Continue reading

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Inside of your hand.

This morning felt sad. I could have wallowed in it. Or drowned in it. But that’s not so much my style. So L and I went to Target for a gift card I needed, and while we were there I … Continue reading

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Thinking of ways to get back home.

Fuck. My eating disorder is fucking loud today. I had started my day excited that it felt like a new start of healthiness and healing. I made Brussels sprouts even! Oh, but did my body (mind?) have other plans! This … Continue reading

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Just hold on.

I’m having a moment where I’m trying to remember all our lasts. In case you don’t come back. In case the devastation of that undoes me so irrevocably that I can’t recall a single thing about today. Or yesterday. I … Continue reading

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A drop in the ocean.

I never understand how my dog gets herself so bent in half. She always falls asleep so deeply like this tho, usually right at my feet. It’s been in the back of my mind for a couple months now that … Continue reading

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Escape is never the safest path.

I keep making the not constructive choice. I mean, I realize it serves a purpose, the destructive choices–the eating choices, but they’re not constructive. They feed something in me. No pun intended. I’m just not certain they are fueling anything … Continue reading

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I saw the world spin beneath you.

I thought it couldn’t get worse this morning. Or maybe I knew that it would and that’s why I was so terrified. I was even more scared when Chris told me about catching me talking to some guy on fb. … Continue reading

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